Client’s often ask me ‘where do I go with this pain I’m suffering right now?’ And it’s easy to reach for a bottle of wine, junk food, retail therapy, illicit substances, or whatever it is that provides comfort in the moment. But these are only short term solutions to perhaps longer term issues. My belief is that there is a better, healthier way that can open up opportunities for tremendous personal growth, or post traumatic growth (as opposed to post traumatic stress or PDSD). So I would say, try to sit with the feeling that you have (it’s painful, that’s the point). Sit with the feeling, however it presents itself, be it a wave of grief or loss, a fear, an emptiness inside of you, and accept it for whatever it may be. It’s ok to feel your feelings, to cry or whatever form it takes (although some of us grow up being told otherwise). Look inwards and consider what this feeling is communicating to you. Just what is it that it’s trying to say? If you are familiar with meditation and mindfulness techniques perhaps bring your focus to the breath. This will calm and slow your thoughts to allow enough space for perhaps some new personal insights to emerge. Observe any change in the body and in the feeling, has it moved, got smaller, changed completely? Has it left? Notice you have survived.
This short article is inspired by a session with a client who is making tremendous progress.